Sunday, December 25, 2005

The Festivus Post

I'll start by saying that it's 10:20pm 'Festivus Day' as I start writing this post. I have indulged in all things 'festivussy', so let this be a disclaimer.

I need to get through a few formalities before I begin to ramble in free-form... which is my ultimate intention.

Firstly, there is a 'tag' from Kate that needs sorting. I like to think that Top 5s are my 'bag', so I should be able to nail this one, but I'm such an easy going, amiable chap, that I just might struggle...

Top 5 Weird Habits o' Mine

1)
I keep my fingernails very short. I like to clip them to the 'quick'. While I've never chewed my nails, I have been known to nibble on the skin at the end of my fingers to 'neaten it up' and bring it back into line with my un-naturally shortened nails.

2) When I drink beer in pubs or clubs, which is often (very, very often), I always return my empty glass, can or bottle to the bar before I order another drink. If I'm buying for others, I'll take theirs back too. It all stems back to when I first started drinking in pubs. A barmaid (whose words I'll never forget) told me that I'd always get served quicker if I brought back my 'empty'.

3)
I can sleep anywhere... literally. I think it might be borderline narcolepsy. I've fallen asleep in places such as: the middle of a road, someone's hedge, buses and trains, on the back of a towtruck, on the toilet (multiple times), on a stairwell, against a speaker at a club, in taxis, and on numerous random couches... often, although not always, under the influence of alcohol.

4) Apparenlty I eat meals strangely. I've had this fact pointed out to me on more than one occasion. I've been told that I'm always turning my plate as I eat, instead of reaching across it. And apparently I'm a very 'neat' eater, especially when I'm at a restaurant. None of this is done consciously of course...

5) I'm very anal when it comes to my CDs. They are filed in alphabetical order, and I'm not keen on any of them being out of their 'spots' or cases for too long.

There's also the whole 'grammar nazi' thing, but I think that's a common trait amongst bloggers which makes it normal, not weird.



From Top 5s to bullets, and random ones at that...

  • My dog PeeDee is a deadset fucking legend. I could waffle on about him for an eternity, but people who blog-on about their pets 'shit me', so I'll stop now.
  • My sister is a deadset fucking legend. I wish I had a fraction of her 'drive'.
  • The grade that I got for the one unit that I did complete last semester was a whole lot better than I expected... it might just give me the impetus I need to complete the two units that I deferred, then I can start to look for 'proper work'.
  • As much as I love Perth, I'm ready to get the hell out of here... I'm thinking Canberra, Melbourne or the Northern Territory. But wherever I go, PeeDee must come too...
  • I've been chatting online to a pommy lass. She's coming to Perth on Feb. I'm looking forward to meeting her...
  • Texas Hold 'em Poker is a dangerously addictive game.
  • I could never be a Muslim... I like ham too much, especially this time of year.
  • A good friend who now lives in Melbourne called me today... I miss her more than words can describe.
  • I called a friend during the week that I'd had a falling-out with a couple of years ago. It was about 3am when I called her and I was as 'drunk as monkey', but I think the call was well received... I'm trying to build up the courage to call her again - sober.
  • I made another drunk call at an ordinary hour the following night to my brother (who now lives in NZ (5 hours time difference)). I was out boozing with a couple of his old mates and thought (in my drunken wisdom) that he'd like to chat with us, despite the fact that it was 5:30am his time. I can't remember the details of the conversation, but he rang today and told me that it went something like this:
Cotard: Now you're probably gonna be upset with your brother for calling at this hour...

Cotard's Bro: Huh?!? What fucking time is this?!?

Cotard: Trust me... do what I say... sit up... swing your legs over the side of your bed... now hit yourself a couple of times in the head... not too hard, you don't want to hurt yourself... Awake now? I'm on the piss with two of your best mates and thought you might want to chat to them... think of it as a Festivus present...

*Cotard hands phone to equally festive (drunk) friends of Cotard's Bro*

Half an hour, and many laughs later, all is forgiven about the early wake up call...



That's all for now... too drunk, too tired...

Listening to: The Waifs - A Brief History

8 Comments:

At 6:27 pm, Blogger Unsane said...

amusant!

 
At 7:23 pm, Blogger Steph said...

Merry Christmas Cotard. Nothing like a drunken phone call to get you in the mood :P

 
At 6:10 am, Blogger Melina said...

I was pretty bad with the drunken dialing this weekend myself.

 
At 8:10 am, Blogger jenny said...

i share your weird habits number 3 and 5. and it sounds like you get a lot of really good ideas while drunk :)

 
At 1:59 pm, Blogger Melina said...

where you at? I try msn (that I downloaded just for you) all the time...miss ya

 
At 5:21 am, Anonymous Fyodor said...

The ham thing is quite a pissoff, topped only by the bacon and crackling things. There's really not a lot going for Islam in the whole pork-products genre. Shame really, as it's probably one of the top 3 monotheisms, and really quite popular.

 
At 10:03 pm, Blogger Jay said...

Happy new year kiddo. Strange stuff.

 
At 1:03 am, Blogger Melina said...

Where are you sugar booger??

 

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